…that is the question.
Can’t believe I am bastardising Shakespeare to come up with this blog post title. How wrong of me!
I am in a bit of a quandary. My due date for cupcake’s arrival is exactly a week away and I am starting to have doubts about my birth options.
With my 1st pregnancy I had planned a water birth and to be as natural as possible. I was, however, open to all possibilities so wasn’t disappointed or anything when it went the way it did. In the end, Munchkin went 12 days overdue and I had to be induced. I then went through a 32 hour labour, had an epidural at about 24 hours in and then following 2 failed ventouse attempts, had to have an emergency c-section. Couldn’t really have been further from my original idea!
Second time round, my options are a bit reduced. There is a small risk (0.2%) that if I have a VBAC (vaginal birth after c-section) that my scar could rupture which is pretty dangerous. This risk to me seems pretty small and the statistic at my hospital for people having a successful VBAC is about 75% which I think sounds good. All the way through this pregnancy I have been firmly in the camp of trying the VBAC option.
This decision has been driven from how hard I found it to recover from the c-section the last time. I spent 5 days in hospital after the birth, unable to really move or pick up Munchkin. Movement was pretty painful for a good amount of time afterwards and the idea of going through that again with a baby plus a very active toddler is not appealing. I want to be able to go home as soon as I can so I am not away from the Munchkin for too long and also don’t want to feel like I have to push him away so he doesn’t hurt me.
However, I had an appointment with my consultant yesterday to discuss my options. Essentially, they will still let me go past my due date but if I have to be induced again then the risk of the scar rupturing goes up to 2%. Again, didn’t seem that bad to me until my husband said that was 1 in 50 people which makes it sound worse. The consultant said that I could decide if I wanted to book in for a planned c-section.
My worry is this: I’ve never really understood why I wasn’t able to give birth normally the last time. I told him this and he said that someone should have discussed the last birth with me (thanks for telling me this now). If the baby was in the wrong position there is nothing to say that I couldn’t give birth naturally this time. However, if it was just because Munchkin was big (he was 9lbs 4 oz/4.3kg) and this baby is shaping up to be big then maybe I am not set up to have big babies. If the latter is true then to me it would make more sense to have the c-section rather than go through a really long labour that would end in a c-section anyway.
I am booked in for another appointment next week where they will look at my previous notes and we can discuss options.
Really….I wish the baby would just come of its own accord and I wouldn’t have to make the decision!
Wondering if anyone out there has been in a similar situation or just your thoughts.