Well, after having looked forward to my morning sans baby for a while now I feel deflated after it is over.
I left the house this morning at 9.30am after kissing my smiley baby son goodbye and left him with his nanny. I then promptly burst into tears and cried all the way to the bus stop, ruining my carefully applied mascara (that was a foolish mistake). I just felt so incredibly miserable that I had left him and it was compounded by seeing lots of mums with their babies in buggies. What on earth was I doing leaving him with someone else while I went shopping? I mean I will be leaving him to go to work and today is just a chance for him to get used to the nanny but it still felt weird.
It was nice to have a coffee and read a magazine, it was nice buying a new dress, it was nice browsing beauty products. But it wasn’t as much fun as I thought it would be.
When I got back he was napping and apparently had been fine but I still felt guilty. Sigh…
I really hope it gets easier to leave him otherwise going back to work is going to suck big time. Am I doing the right thing after all?